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Welcome To my Page.
My Name is Aaron I live in Melbourne Australia.
Born in Belfast N.Ireland moved to Australia 6/7/1966.
GOD AND THE INVENTOR OF THE HARLEY |
The inventor of the Harley Davidson Motorcycle Corporation, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven.
At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur, "Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."
Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, " I want to hang out with God."
St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room and introduced him to God.
Arthur then asked God, "Hey, aren't you the inventor of woman?"
God said, "Ah, yes."
"Well," said Arthur, "professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention."
1. There's too much inconsistency in the front end protrusion.
2. It chatters constantly at high speed.
3. Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much.
4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust.
5. And the maintenance costs are outrageous.
"Hmmmm, you may have some good points there," replied God, "hold on."
God went to his Celestial super computer, typed in a few words and waited for his results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.
"Well it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur,"but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours."
AUTHOR UNKNOWN!!
What ever this page is all about Iam not so sure, so what ever come's a long will be just as much a surprise to me as it is to you.
A little old couple walked slowly into McDonalds one cold winter evening.
They looked out of place amid the young families and young couples eating
there that night Some of the customers looked admiringly at them.
You could tell what the admirers were thinking. "Look, there is a couple who
has been through a lot together, probably for 60 years or more!"
The little old man walked right up to the cash register, placed his order with
no hesitation and then paid for their meal.
The couple took a table near the back wall and started taking food off of the tray.
There was one hamburger, one order of French fries and one drink.
The little old man unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half.
He placed one half in front of his wife. Then he carefully counted out the
French fries, divided them in two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.
He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them.
As the man began to eat his few bites of hamburger the crowd began to get restless.
Again you could tell what they were thinking. "That poor old couple.
All they can afford is one meal for the two of them."
As the man began to eat his French fries one young man stood and came over to the old couples' table.
He politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple to eat.
The old man replied that they were just fine.
They were used to sharing everything.
Then the crowd noticed that the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite.
She just sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.
Again the young man came over and begged them to let him buy them something to eat.
This time the lady explained that no, they were used to sharing everything together.
As the little old man finished eating and was wiping his face neatly with a napkin the young man could stand it no longer.
Again he came over to their table and offered to buy some food.
After being politely refused again he finally asked a question of the little old lady.
"Ma'am, why aren't you eating you said that you share everything.
What is it that you are waiting for?"
She answered. "The teeth"
AUTHOR UNKNOWN
If you wish to drop me an email please feel free to do so.
This would have to be the most exciting thing I have ever done in my life, beats watching TV don't you think.
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There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby. The preacher went to the congregation and asked for a raise.
After much consideration and discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the
preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck. After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the Congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's salary.
There was much yelling and bickering about how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church. Finally, the preacher got up and spoke to the crowd "Having children is an act of God!" Silence fell on the congregation.
In the back of the room, a little old lady stood up and in her frail voice said, "Snow >and rain are also acts of God, but when we get too much, we wear rubbers.
A woman was standing before the bedroom mirror, admiring herself in her expensive new outfit. She posed this way & that.
Her husband, looking on with disinterest, remarked "Your bum is the size of a 3 burner barbecue."
Later that evening, tucked up cozy in bed, he leant over, tapped her on the shoulder, and asked hopefully "How about it?"
She replied "It's hardly worth lighting the Barbie for half a sausage now is it?"
AUTHOR UNKNOWN!!
almr@hotkey.net.au
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Do you belive in Leprechaun's ?
Well I do, the little green man up above!
He's one, just thought I would let you know.
almr@hotkey.net.au |
